I went out for a walk with my grandparents this afternoon. My grandpa got Dexter (my wheelchair) out and we prepared to go. I was really excited, I'm rarely well enough to go out. We got out on the road and I started to panic. The noise of the traffic was too loud and I'd left my ear plugs at home, there were too many cars, too many people. I got really worked up until my grandpa told me we should give up and go home. I knew that if I turned back I wouldnt go out again for a really long time, even if I was healthy enough. So we kept going. We stopped at a quiet cafe for a cup of tea before turning back, and I sat praying that God would take away my fear. The ride back was easier, it was still noisy and busy but I wasn't so scared, I was visibly more relaxed.
I'm sure the next time I go out I will have to tackle the same fears, but I know that I can face anything with Christ.
Philippians 4:13 says "For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength."
1 John 4:18a says "Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear."
God helps me through the little things like taking away my fear about leaving the house, or bigger things like dealing with this illness and how it's affected my life. Most of all I can stand under the assurance that God loves me unconditionally without reservation and through that I know I don't have to be afraid of anything.